extreme cheesecake, buche de noel style

i'm not sure if everyone is familiar with the traditional holiday yule log dessert...i had never seen one until martha stewart included one in her magazine several years ago. a delicious dessert that looks like a log on a forest floor, covered in mushrooms? the yule log dessert has haunted me ever since. why have i never attempted to make one, you might ask? the main reason is that i hate making cakes that look like something other than a cake. (however, i'm completely charmed by cake decorations that are edible, taste delicious, and look like something they're not.)

the only thing to do was to make the forest floor scene on top of a cake that looks like a cake. i struggled with this for a while, because the yule 'log' is really just a big swiss roll (as in little debbie), and it doesn't actually look like a log at all. so why does it bother me? i guess i just think i can do better...for instance, let's add cheesecake to this equation.

cheesecake is another thing i'm particular about: i don't like it most of the time. one thing i don't approve of is the soggy crumb crust generally found on a baked cheesecake. i insist on using a layer of biscuit roulade or sponge...it tastes better and absorbs excess moisture, making the cheesecake come out perfect without the aid of cornstarch. recently i found a cheesecake recipe that actually requires no alteration (although i alter it anyway sometimes, for fun).

rose levy-beranbaum cordon rose cheesecake

454 grams philadelphia cream cheese
200 grams sugar
150 grams eggs
47 grams fresh squeezed, strained lemon juice
6 grams vanilla
726 grams sour cream

preheat the oven to 350. place in it a pan at least 2" larger than the one you will be baking the cheesecake in. inside this pan, put 1/2" of water.
grease and line your chosen cheesecake pan with sponge, biscuit roulade, or just parchment paper, whatever you prefer.
in a large mixing bowl beat softened cream cheese until smooth on medium-low speed. add sugar and beat until very smooth. add eggs in three portions (its about three eggs, so if you don't feel compelled to weigh them, suit yourself), beating after each addition until smooth. add the lemon juice, vanilla and salt and beat just until incorporated. beat in sour cream lightly until blended.
pour the batter into the prepared pan. this is the part that might seem unneccesary...i'm neither here nor there about springform pans. i don't own one, and honestly i haven't needed one yet. if you're absolutely confident that yours doesn't leak, i encourage you to use it. on the other hand, a plain 2 1/2" tall straight-sided 9" cake pan works splendidly and never leaks. here's why the leaking is a big deal: you're going to set the cheesecake in the pan of hot water in the oven and steam it like an english pudding for about 45 minutes - an hour, or until just lightly browning on top. then turn the oven off and cool the cheesecake, untouched, in the oven for one hour. remove to a rack and cool to room temp, perhaps another hour. cover with plastic wrap and refrigerate overnight. the reason to bake and cool it this way is because, like me, you feel that if the cheesecake isn't the creamiest, most delicious one you've ever had, then why bother; and if your cheesecake cracks while cooling *gasp*, then you can't bear to show your face alongside said cheesecake. cracking generally occurs when a cheesecake is cooled too quickly.

but, if your cheesecake does crack in the center, you can always cover it with delicious fruit topping and hope no one will notice. it'll still be the best cheesecake anyone has ever eaten.


now, for the roulade recipe, also from rose levy beranbaum's "the cake bible"

33 grams sifted flour (unbleached!) (this can easily be subbed out for a half and half blend of tapioca starch and potato starch for an amazing gluten-free cake!!)
23 grams unsifted cornstarch (for chocolate roulade (pictured) substitute 10 g of the cornstarch for cocoa powder, mixed with 1 1/2 T boiling water)
4 large eggs
1 egg yolk
113 grams white sugar
3 grams vanilla
1/4 tsp cream of tartar

preheat the oven to 450 f
whisk flour and cornstarch together
separate two of the eggs. to the yolks, add the extra yolk and the two remaining whole eggs. beat lightly. add most of the sugar, reserving a bit for later. beat on high until thick, fluffy and triple in volume, @ 5 minutes. beat in vanilla.
fold half the flour mixture in gently until flour has disappeared. repeat with remaining flour.
beat the two egg whites until foamy, then add cream of tartar and beat until soft peaks form. add the bit of reserved sugar and beat until stiff peaks form. fold the whites into the cake batter and spread into a 17" x 12" jelly roll pan lined with parchment. or divide between two 8" cake pans lined with parchment.
also good: sub 35 grams of almond flour and 21 grams unbleached flour for the flour and cornstarch).
now, baking this thing is kind of unusual. a half sheet pan takes between seven and eight minutes to bake, and the resulting cake is less than 1/4" thick.

of course, you could serve the cheesecake as is. it doesn't need anything, not the biscuit. but, the fun for me lies is overdoing it, in frivolity. so this is only the beginning. my plan is to stack two cheesecakes on top of each other, edge with biscuit, and top with meringue mushrooms, brownie crumb 'dirt', pie crust leaves, homemade green sprinkles for grass...


the sprinkle idea came from a blog called Brave Tart
http://bravetart.com/recipes/RainbowSprinkles